A Throwing Up Thanksgiving

A Throwing Up Thanksgiving

Does it sound disgusting? Good. Because it was.

This Thanksgiving I was thankful for pink, plastic trashcans, any sleep available and that whatever monstrous flu bug hit our family only lasted a few hours … each.

Starting the week of Thanksgiving, during my daughter’s birthday brunch, my one-year-old got sick. No big deal–he’s a baby and babies throw up all the time. It was probably that cupcake he ate earlier.

Later that night, we headed to my husband’s parents’ house, who happen to have two of their daughters with their husbands and between each other eight children staying with them.

The one-year-old gets sick again. All over grandpa.

We go home. Think next to nothing of it, because the baby’s acting find aside from his two episodes. The next night we take the kids over to grandpa and grandma’s again to hang out with family after a problem-free and happy day.

This time, our three-year-old throws up, all over grandpa, during Looney Tunes. Twice.

She comes home and spends the night next to our bed, throwing up into a pink, plastic trashcan.

Of course, the next morning, I’m sick and have to call into work. The pink, plastic trashcan is now my best friend, too.

The next victim is my husband, on the day before Thanksgiving, which is the day of a surprise date night that’s been planned for over a month. He sleeps all day and feels well enough to go out. Just barely.

On Thanksgiving, my husband’s HUGE family gathers. We here rumblings of others who may feel sick, and from Thanksgiving day to Saturday afternoon 3/4s of the entire family has thrown up.

You may not think this is a big deal, but take into consideration, there were around 50 people at the Thanksgiving gathering. That’s a lot of pink, plastic trashcans filled with puke.

So, in the spirit of giving, thank you, family, for sharing in this year’s Throw Up Thanksgiving. Here’s to hoping that next year we have a different theme.

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Broken Arms and Fire Alarms

Broken-Arms-and-Fire-Alarms

Yesterday was an interesting day for my family. And yes, it did include both a broken arm and several fire alarms.

It all started at work with a text from my husband.

Text

To which, of course, I immediately called him.

Our son’s been attempting to get out of his highchair for a while, and for the past week, my husband and I discussed finding the straps to his highchair … but never actually did it.

And it happened. Our almost 1.5-year-old got out of his highchair and tumbled onto the wood floor.

When I called my husband, I almost thought he was kidding. Like a sick, ‘oh, you should’ve gotten the highchair straps out sooner’ kind of a joke, but he wasn’t. O

Our son wasn’t crying much after the initial fall, so amazingly, neither myself nor my husband were panicked or overly worried. He was in and out of the doctor’s office in just a couple hours and came home with an adorable little cast on his arm.

You’d think that would be enough excitement for one 24-hour period, but you’d be wrong.

All was well in our house, both of the kids went to bed by 9pm and slept soundly. And even I, for the first time in three days, went to bed before 2am, and for the first time in weeks, fell asleep before 11pm.

I have an ongoing joke with myself and most moms–who often agree, except it’s not a joke. I’m being very literal when I say:

Every single time I go to bed early, it happens to be the one night an event occurs that keeps me up most of the night. Tweet: Every single time I go to bed early, it happens to be the one night an event occurs that keeps me up most of the night via @homemadeexp

So continues my unwavering roll of never sleeping more than 5 hours at a time.

Around midnight, our power went off. No big deal. That wasn’t going to stop me from sleeping. The event that was going to stop me from sleep occurred at 2am when the power came back on and all the interconnected fire alarms throughout the house went off, waking the ENTIRE family.

We got the fire alarm shut off, but not the children. Not until 4am at least.

So, as my husband and I finally settled back into bed, he said, “What a night” to which I replied, “Broken arms and fire alarms” and promptly laid awake another half an hour excited about what a perfect post title that will be…

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5 Things That Are (Mommy Needs A) Break-ing Mommy

Breaking Habits

Throughout the week, I find the words “mommy needs a break” popping into my head–oh–about every hour. And I often turn to the same comforts, vices, what have you, when I do find the opportunity to take a break.

On one hand, I think what mommy really needs is a break from my breaks, because the things I’m turning to really aren’t that beneficial in the long run.

On the other hand, I know and often sometimes do many of the things I need to be ultimately, big-picture happier and healthier, but I also just want my breaks to be legitimate, mindless, indulgent breaks.

In the words of One Republic, “Every thing that kills me makes me feel alive.” And here are the 5 major things that are breaking mommy.

Staying up late. Lately, I’ve seen a quote circulating around Facebook that reads, “I’m so tired but I’ll probably be awake until 3 a.m. for no reason,” and I couldn’t relate more. Every morning I’d beat myself over the head for staying up so late if I wasn’t so exhausted, and every morning I swear tonight will be the night I go to bed early. Yet, every night 1 a.m. rolls around, and there I am, wide awake, doing absolutely nothing.

Drinking caffeine. Hello coffee, goodbye control. As much as I love my coffee, I must admit it’s become a vicious cycle that leaves me in dire need of more energy and leads me to adding another cup to my daily regimen. I feel like I can conquer the world … until I need another cup of coffee. I think I also just figured out why I stay up until 3 a.m. “for no reason.”

Drinking alcohol. And if I’m being honest with myself: yes, that still includes red wine. It shouldn’t because the doctor prescribes some people a glass of red wine before bed, but in reality, that was not a prescription I received, and even so, that glass shouldn’t equal half the wine bottle. It does counteract the caffeine though, so cheers!

Being a foodie. That’s actually FOODie, with a capital F-O-O-D. I love eating, making and trying all kinds of food. It’s what I do when I’m bored. It’s what I do when I’m celebrating. It’s what I do when I’m with family. It’s what I do when I’m PMSing. And least importantly, it’s what I do when I’m hungry. I swear, I’m going to eat healthy starting tomorrow…

Keeping up with the Kardashians. No, I don’t actually keep up with the Kardashians [insert overrated, cliché, judgmental, disgusted noise here]. I do, however, love keeping up with the latest gossip, news(feeds) and of course, all of my favorite t.v. shows. Does all of it really matter? No. Does it take precious time away from all the other things I could be doing i.e. productiveness and ability to change the world and better myself as a human being? Yes. But the next episode starts in 15 seconds and the remote is just so far away. I’ll stop tomorrow.

 

 

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15 Completely Illogical Reasons Mom Wants Another Baby

 

15 Illogical Reasons Mom Wants Another Baby

Photo courtesy of Tabitha Odle, Alathea Photography

There’s no denying that there’s a longing–no matter how illogical or fleeting–each time a chapter in life comes to an end. Especially when it’s time to decide whether you want to continue having kids or be done.

It’s during that decision making process, or even after you think you’ve made the decision, that you begin to notice the little, ridiculous things that make pregnancy and having a new baby seem suddenly and unrealistically awesome again.

Here are 15 reasons that make mom-ing seem wonderful all over again.

1. There are so many toys and an entire playroom that need a few more years of use–otherwise, your either hoarding kids’ toys or giving them away, and that seems like a waste of an entire room full of toys.

2. That one time one of them actually did something sweet that brought tears to your eyes.

3. There’s an outfit at Target you want your kids to wear, but they’re all too big now.

4. You’ll do everything perfectly this pregnancy–yoga, classical music, clean eating, the works.

5. You secretly look forward to the hospital stay after giving birth.

6. All of your babies have hit the stage where they’ll no longer cuddle.

7. Because you want at least one pregnancy where the gender remains a surprise.

8. For 9 more months, the eternal baby bump you have will actually be because there’s a baby in there.

9. There are endless amounts of awesome announcement and reveal video/photo/post ideas bouncing around in your head.

10. Being required to meet with an OBGYN 20+ times throughout your pregnancy will also double as a checkup anytime your hypochondria kicks in.

11. There are so many names you still want to use.

12. The firsts never get old, and there’s only one way to get more.

13. There’s a higher chance at least one of them will take care of you when you’re old.

14. There are plenty of nursery themes you have yet to execute.

15. So you can take advantage of all the new developments and items you wished you’d had when your other children were babies.

 

21 Reasons Summer is a Parent’s Frenemy

 

Summertime

As a general person before kids, summer was the season to look forward to all year long. It was a time to relax, get a tan, be outside, enjoy friends, travel, read a book … until you become a parent–enter clunky toy to the head, exit summer-before-kids daydream.

Yes, it’s mostly enjoyable to spend more time with the kids. The family time and summer activities are a great change of pace, but there’s no denying that the second we become parents summer goes from being our BFF to being our frenemy.

Here are 21 reasons summer is now the season parents love to hate.

1. Someone we know will graduate and make us feel old. Bonus points if it’s one of our own.

2. The kids are home all day. Every. Single. Day.

3. Bathing suits are no longer our friends.

4. It’s too hot.

5. And sweating all the time sucks.

6. Sunscreen is slimy, smells weird and has to be slathered all over ourselves and the kids every time we step foot outside.

7. At home, the air conditioning only cools some rooms–either the kids’ rooms are way too cold and the parents sweat all night or the parents’ room has to be kept bone-chillingly cold to keep the kids comfortable. Main gathering areas are always hot.

8. Fans just push around hot air.

9. Family vacation.

10. Large bodies of water are the highest item on our worst-case-scenario list; they’re also the highest item on our kids’ to-do list.

11. It wouldn’t be summer without at least one sunburn … with peeling skin.

12. Unless it’s raining, there’s no justification for not wanting to go outside.

13. The only good time to workout is way too early in the morning or way too late at night.

14. All the good t.v. shows are off the air until Fall.

15. The Oscar-worthy movies don’t come out until December.

16. Your home has replaced the school as the place everyone’s kids hangout all day.

17. Ergo, you have to go grocery shopping daily.

18. There’s no point in doing anyone’s hair, because humidity.

19. Aside from the 4th of July, back-to-school time is the closest thing to a holiday.

20. If you dare take advantage of being able to have an outdoor event, it will rain.

21. The amount of people at any kid-friendly attraction (zoo, amusement park, museum, playground, swimming pool) is absolutely unreal. And borderline not worth it.

12 Things That Make Me Want To Go All ‘The Slap’ On Kids

Okay, don’t sue me or start the comment attack just yet. I’m obviously exaggerating about slapping children, but some things, they just hit all the buttons.

SONY DSC

Photo courtesy of Jake Davis via Flickr Creative Commons.

As parents, sitters, people who have observed the species called children from across the room, we’ve all seen kids who do things that can only merit the response of “What the actual frick?!” It happens, and although kids’ logic is brilliant at times, it’s completely nonexistent at others.

So, as I was going through my life with kids as of late, I decided to compile a list of all the things little ones around me were doing that made me want to drop the spaghetti bowl and throw my hands up in the air. I’m sure just about every parent can relate to at least one … or 12 of these.

1. “I don’t like peanut butter with peanuts in it.”

REALLY, kid? Newsflash, peanut butter is made from peanuts.

2. “I don’t like green noodles.”
But you like the white and red ones? Hmm, that’s odd because THEY’RE THE SAME THING!

3. Child 1 plays contently.
Child 2 picks up a toy that’s been gathering dust in a corner for LITERALLY–yes I’m using that word correctly in this scenario–Child 1’s entire existence.
Child 1 throws back chairs and all items in its way like a member of the SOA motorcycle club during a confrontation and screams, “That’s MY toy!”

No, child. You didn’t even know that toy was in your life until you saw someone else playing with it.

4. Parent: “Don’t do ___.”
Child: Immediately does it.

5. Child: Normal all day.
Parent: Makes a phone call.
Child: [at top of lungs] ♫ SINGING ANY AND EVERY RANDOM SONG THEY KNOW WITH ALL THE CORRECT LYRICS AND WITHOUT TAKING ANY BREATHS OR BREAKS MAKING IT IMPOSSIBLE TO HEAR OR TO TELL THEM TO LEAVE WITHOUT TALKING LOUDLY ENOUGH THAT THE PERSON ON THE OTHER END OF THE PHONE HAS BLEEDING EARS ♫

6. Person: Goes in bathroom.
Child: [at top of lungs] “YOU POOPIN’?!”

Note: I personally find this one hilarious, but that’s for all you non-parents or bathroom-humor-sensitive people out there who probably want to just go ahead and flush yourself down the toilet after that happens.

7. 11:27am: Parent changes diaper.
11:28am: Child poops.

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!

8. Parent: Sets [insert item here] on the table.
Child: Grabs it. Hides it.
Parent: Spends 47 minutes looking for it, is an hour late to wherever and receives death stares for the duration of time there.

Note: Although I more want to slap myself for leaving any items in the reach of grubby, child hands. I know better.

9. Parent: Says ONE thing on accident for the first time in the entire duration of child’s life because you let it slip after being very careful for years.
Child: Immediately turns into a parrot on repeat for the next 2 months.

10. Child: “Can I ___?”
Mom: “No.”
Child: [runs, loudly and obviously, to dad]: “Can I ___?”

11. Child smacks you in the face with hard object/pulls your hair/you step on a lego left out by child.

12. “Why? why? why! WHY? WHY!? Why?” [“Mom” may also be inserted into #12]

Why…

I’m sure I’ve only hit the tip of the iceberg with this list, but the struggle is real people. What do kids do that you absolutely cannot stand?

 

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Craft Alliance Makers Ball

Just a few days ago, there was a wonderful event held in St. Louis called Makers Ball. This was an evening from Craft Alliance Center for Art + Design that celebrated makers and the power of craft. One reason I’m such a huge advocate of Craft Alliance is because they support the arts … which is too quickly disappearing in the educational world our children are raised in today. The proceeds from this event helped support the exhibition series and education programs at Craft Alliance and in turn, helps give new life to the crafters and arts in the communities around us.

Craft Alliance’s mission is to provide education and inspiration to a community of artists, student, collectors and overall art enthusiasts, nationally. They do so by offering free classes for both children and parents, supporting and showcasing artists’ work and encouraging those who collect art.

I’m lucky enough to be a few blocks away from one of Craft Alliance’s locations on the Delmar Loop in STL and think it’s a great opportunity for those anywhere, but especially in the STL area, to get involved creatively.

Makers Ball was just one event–there are so many other fun and crafty ways to ignite your creative juices with Craft Alliance. Here are some of the awesome highlights and best dressed from Makers Ball.

Best Dressed

Abida Farooqui & Yasmin Hakim

Abida Farooqui & Yasmin Hakim

Grace

Grace Kubilius, Craft Alliance Fiber Artist-in-Residence posing in front of her interactive panel weaving for auction at Makers Ball.

Jackie Chambers

Jackie Chambers, Craft Alliance Director of Development and Communications

Makers Ball Highlights

Grace & I

I was able to take on Grace Kubilius’s interactive weaving up for auction.

Featured Artist

Featuring handmade art, glass blowing.

Featured Artist

Craft Alliance featured artist, creating pottery.

Makers Ball

Shots of a packed house at #MakersBallSTL this year

Makers Mark

Bartender displaying Makers Mark, an event sponsor

From her collection, "Oh How I Love You," Grace Kubilius showcases her wearable arts of love at Makers Ball

From her collection, “Oh How I Love You,” Grace Kubilius showcases her wearable arts of love at Makers Ball

If you were unable to attend Makers Ball, you can donate here or sign up for a class here!

Afterwards, the husband and I were able to enjoy one of our favorites in STL, Central Table in the central west end. We got to enjoy their outside patio this time in the perfect, evening weather! A few foodie shots from our dinner as well:

Central Table

Central Table

Clover Sushi Roll

We started off with the Clover Sushi Roll

Lamb

Lamb Tortellini

Pork

Ginger Crusted Pork

Patio Seating

Visit Central Table on Twitter, Instagram or Facebook at @CentralTableSTL

#HE is proud to team up with ALIVE Magazine to promote Craft Alliance Makers Ball and Central Table.